a friend forwarded an email with the below series of photos...

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Subject: FW: Animal Lovers

Who said only humans know what love is?

Yes, animals are more deluded because of their capacity of their physical body, but occasionally some of them might be able show us the love that we have forgotten on our 'busy road'. Just like this story.

this is real touching...



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why did the people only stopped the cars, got out in the middle of the busy streets...to TAKE PHOTOS??? instead of helping the poor dogs off the road??? something i can never understand....

a new home is found for amy...with a family of 7 members in the household including the maid/helper...it was the eldest child in the family who contacted me for amy...i have boarded amy in boarding over the long weekend when we were out of town, gave her the permission to pay amy a visit during that time with her parents...the next thing was an sms telling me of their interest and wish to take amy...on sunday after we came back from our short break, fetched amy and off we went to pay her and the family a visit at their place...amy was curious and exploring the place all the time while we had a chat...she went to the backyard, the garden, kitchen, etc. sniff here and there...very comfy but knowing her being so comfy was becoz we were there with her...also judging from the way the family handled her, it was very assuring...after some discussion with hubby, we have decided to re-home amy to this family coming weekend...

some of the things that amy will enjoy over there...

- she will be staying in a terrace house with lots of room to roam including a small garden...

- she will always have company during the day...for now it will be the maid/helper who is fine with taking care of dogs...and the eldest daughter who is currently looking for work...and with their parents planning to retire in a short while, or so i was told, amy will have additional two persons at home with her...most of the time if not all the time...

- they are experienced dog owners as they had a dog for more than 10 years who just recently passed away due to old age and sickness...i was initially concerned that they have not had a beagle but based on our assessment on how much they love and miss their dog, i think it should be fine...i have more or less run down a list of what to expect of a beagle...esp. their stubbornness and their happy-go-lucky attitude...but i have to remember to do it one more time the day amy goes to their place for good...and reminder to myself to tell them not to overfeed, as amy luuuuvvvvv food and will give you the pathetic "oh...i am still hungry...feed me feed me now!" look...it took us some years to learn to resist but it was too late then as she was already overweight like a sausage...hehe...took some dieting to go back to the slender her :) i will hate to see her go back to being that sausage again...

- amy will have the free roam of the house, indoor and outdoor...and she will be allowed to share a room with the eldest daughter...ON HER BED!! luxury!

- the family will take on the task of walking, bathing, providing the general care to amy on their own, and not passing to their helper/maid...as compare to most families i have come across who will usually pass such tasks to their maid/helper...

- amy will have a personal vet at home as one of the siblings is studying vet science and will be attached to the same vet clinic amy is currently going...

however, after speaking with friends who are experienced with re-homing process and friends who have provided short-term boarding to amy before when we were out of town to better understand how amy will handle us not being around...and what is the best approach to make this transition easier...we have decided not to have the weekly visit for the first two months...as amy will miss us during the initial period...the last thing you want to do is to visit her to give her false hope that she is going back with us, only to realise that we have to continue to leave her in her new home at the end of the visit...this was what was observed by my friends in the the previously re-homed dogs that she had helped before...that sometimes this might bring the dogs into further and deeper depression and prolong the adjustment period....

so...the new owner and us, we have agreed to the trial period of 2-3 months...during the initial two months we will not be visiting so not to interfere...but she will keep us closely informed and updated with mails and photos on the progress...we will come together again at the end of the trial period for an assessment...should things really do not work out for any reasons, we will not hesistate to bring amy back with us...

my friend who have seen many successful cases, told me once what to expect of a successful re-homing effort...that at the end of the 2-3 months period when we visit, amy will recognise us, greet us, come to play with us etc. and at the end of the visit, when the new family call for her, she will just drop everything and follow them home happily...and you will know at that time, where amy home will be, and where will her heart be...i mentioned this to hubby and we both come to agree that this part of the process perhaps will be what hurt the most in the end...but to stay focus and objective...as long as she is loved, and well taken care of...i hope for the best...whatever the best turns out to be for my amy...who will always be my baby girl...

p/s: thanks to everyone for your advise on things to do to help her cope with her fear...and for those who have offered to dogsit or to bring her along for walks and run with their dogs etc. thank you so much, very grateful and much appreciated...

got my very first nasty anonymous poster for this post....what fun!! first of all, i will like to thank to those who have posted constructive comments, advise...and for those who actually took the time to reply to these nasty comments, thank you!

usually i will not be bothered as i always believe in allowing others to exercise their freedom of speech, say whatever you like, this journal is afterall made available to everyone in the public anyway...if you have not noticed, these anonymous posters have blah many things, e.g. me being irresponsible, if i would give away my first child, etc etc. and in my replies, i do not address these things said, for i do not see the need to explain myself, why should i? this is my life, is it any of anyone's business in the first place? but you have the rights to say whatever you like and i do not delete your comments however nasty they are...i would usually just let them be...however...this is one occasion i will "lower" myself to your level so to "respond" to whatever craps for those who had gut to write and yet do not have one to reveal your identidy...not only for my sake but for the sake of my friends who bothered to respond to you...i owe them at least this one...

1. anonymous poster 1 said...

"Now I ask you, if you have a 3rd kid, would you give one kid away? I don't think so. If you choose to have a dog, you should be prepared to go through all the sacrifices for the dog. Your reasons for letting her go and your profess love for her.. I think you're a very confused person. If there is love, there is always time.

FUCKED UP!"

how dare you and who do you think you are and what rights do you have to judge? have you seen how we live our life at home with amy? do you even get the reasons why i am re-homing my dog? do you like to keep your dog in a crate at least 12 hours a day 5 days a week? i do not boast about how i take care of my dog, and the "sacrifices" made, does not mean there is none. just becoz i choose not to write about our schedules and what we do in our normal days in a public web site? and you just based your judgement on what you are allowed to read on the surface to condemn? do you know why in the first place i chose not to reply to your comment posted? just take a good read of what you wrote above, it does show how shallow a person you are? read deeper...

2. let me break my response in point forms so you can better understand with your small brain, if any at all...the same "fucked up" anonymous poster's reply to Lily...

"Oh yes, here comes the usual long nosed hero..."

- in your later reply to me, that you seem upset that we called you names, e.g. chicken shit? and yet you called my friend a "long nosed hero"? well...such classic case of the pot calling the kettle black...

"And may I ask, how do you know I've never walked in their shoes? You assume to much. "

- sounds to me that you are doing the same thing yourself, that you too have assumed too much about me and my dog, isn't it. at least Lily and I know each other in real life and she knows amy...

"A pet is for life. You do not dessert them when you have other companions. If one is crippled, I can understand. If one cannot make time because of other and newer commitments, I think the whole issue goes back to the fact that that person is NOT RESPONSIBLE enough to consider all factors when they take up a pet."

- yes, i admit, amy came into my life as an "impulse buy"...i did not consider all factors...but we are human and we do make mistakes...we learn from them and we move on...i learnt how much work amy came with...and we tried and got her trained, put in effort to make it work. i used to have weekly badminton session with my friends, which had stopped since the arrival of amy...we seeked professional trainers help to dog proofed our place...she chewed holes to our new place but we lived with it...and moved on...and the list goes on....but like i said i do not like to boast about these and just becoz you dun get to read about them and you do not know me, does not mean i did not do anything.

"I walk my dogs several times a day. On sunny days and on rainy days I drive them to a sheltered carpark. Yes, perhaps I'm more fortunate to be able to walk them that many times but when I am extremely busy and I have to walk them at 2.30am, I walk them at 2.30am."

- i really salute you that you walk your dog at 2.30am...amy will be sleeping and snoring away in her dreamland way before that time...but even if she is not, i would rather play with her in the house during those time than to walk her out in the dark...i do have a family to consider and i will try to stay safe. singapore may be a place of low crime, but does not mean no crime, apparently this campaign from the police does not work to convey the message to some foolish people to stay out of trouble, does it? i have a friend who worked all day and night, and one night chose to walk her dog past midnight...and was followed...if it was not for that dog who was alert and barked at the man as a warning, we will never know what might happen next....

3. ah...finally a reply directly to me from the same chicken shit pukey fucked up anonymous poster:

"But both probably want to have the last say. So here I am giving my last remarks and then you can make a thousand replies and great you win! You're right! As you always will be. Birds of the same feathers flock together."

- what bullshit...since when are we trying to be in a competition with you in replying...and winning or losing?? how CHILDISH one can be? how old are you, really? if you had not noticed, i did not reply to you in the first place, i did not want to coz i did not see the point to go down to your level to explain to you, i still dun. but my friend did...and i just like to ask her not to bother...waste of time really....AND...who's talking having last say or remaks or whatsoever? this is my journal, i will always have the last say irregardless...if you dun like what you read, perfect...the door is always open, just remember to close it POLITELY when you leave...we are all civilised people, well...at least most people who commented in my journal, even some anonymous ones are....and i dun think my readers who come to read about amy's updates appreciate the type of language you used anyway...

"I honestly think you people are just a load of crap. Just remember my first post. When you have another kid, give the 1st one away please. And face it, its all about responsibility which you do not have. Or maybe you don't have the brains to forsee the forseeable future (kids)"

- i usually keep such private to myself and my family and close friends...but for your information, no i was not planning for any children. the "big C" (if you had any form of errr....sexual education that is, i hope you understand what this C stands for haha) failed on me...so i have to live with the consequences...but again, go back and read about the reasons why i am re-homing amy....if kids is the main reason, i would have done it years ago before my first child was even born....again, use your brain, read deeper...there are more details than what you can find on the surface...that is if you have any brain at all....

4. another "long-nosed" die hard supporter of the fucked up poster replied:

"Yes auntie! You're all winners in your own right. There are many kind of winners. A kid that falls and climb back up is a winner. Mothers with a special child are winners. What kind of winner are you? Another voice in the protest? Great you're a winner! I find it amazing no one here commented about the helpful suggestion by one of the anonymous writer about the book to read which may help Amy. Instead, you winners are too obsessed with patting each others back and being so defensive. Winners you are all! I better keep my mouth shout about what sort of winners you people are. It is also strange that the person that made the first reply have a livejournal with section where the date is set at 2008 so that she can "remind" herself of those words. If you read and re-read those paragraphs, you would think harder before you make any comments. If after reading it over and over again and you still can't get it, maybe you should shall it with all your brethren here. One even mentioned about tracking IP address. Are you that free? And may I ask, what are you going to do to that person? What CAN you do to that person? You're a winner. Perhaps you proved yourself bravest. Lay your names down for others to laugh. Another winner mentioned speaks as though outsiders are not allowed to comment on your life. Well, if you ever wish to publish a blog or live journal, know that you are inviting the world in and inviting their comments. If you think this live journal is for your group of "winners" and no one else, I ask you, take your journal private. It won't be much of a loss of reading material to the world. So winners you all are. I applaud you."

- first of all thank you for your applaud...much appreciated :)

- again, there is no competition in the first place for those to have their last says win, i dunno why our dear first poster chose to compete in the first place when no one was competiting with him/her...but you are right, we are all winners.

- no one reply on another comment about the book, does not mean it is not being taken into consideration. just becoz i dun reply? funny the way you people think...like the first poster who accused us of assuming too much of her, likewise here? why dun you ask first if i was doing something as per advise? i at least appreciate more of this anonymouse poster who posted constructive comment and advise for me to try...another option to explore...what do you and the first poster offer? what help? what advise? i might seem ok outside but do you see what might be going on behind the scene, and how emotional we are here in the household? just becoz i dun publish our life online and you dun know us....how shallow and stupid one can be?

- you're right, it is a waste of time to track IP...especially to do so for people like you and the first poster!! oh please!!! dun think too highly of yourself people...and as for taking my journal private or keeping it as public, is it any of your business in the first place? are you the owner? this is the internet, you are free to leave if you do not like what you read...you know the way to the door...if you will please...

funny thing about some dogs owners...really...especially the self-righteous ones who think so highly of themselves...so you think you are responsible dog owners, GOOD FOR YOU and WONDERFUL for your furry ones...you might have been in my shoes whatsoever but who cares, that does not give you the right to judge others and to impose your standard onto others? is this what people need to do to put others down so to place themselves higher, somehow to justify to themselves how great a person they are? be careful when you do so for you will one day be judged with the same harshness and judgement...or worst!

i appreciate comments and replies to my posts in my journal, especially the constructive ones with advise and support...but if you have nothing but nasty things to say in someone's journal and then be all coward about it as "anonymous"...then i will suggest that you pack your bag and take a hike!!

got a number of responses for a new home for amy, some more promising than others...got me thinking of what further information to ask of them and why....need to list them down for my record and referrel, so i dun leave anything out...i hope...

1. the type of place they stay...landed property with yard or flat/aparment? if flat/apartment, how many rooms?

2. where will amy sleep? especially important for landed, if amy will be sleeping indoor or outdoor?

3. will amy have the free roam of the place? this is important as this is the main reason why i think i cannot keep her...as she is now being confined in a crate from 7.30am (when we leave the house to bring the kids to the babysitter and then to work) to almost 8pm (after work and fetching of the kids)...some weeknights will be later when we need to buy groceries from the supermarket...so what kind of life for a dog to be in a crate for more than 12 hours a day? but if i were to pass to someone who is going to do the same, what's the point?

4. is there a park nearby? even tho amy can be quite a couch potato and contended just to laze around at home all day as long as she has company...but she does need to get out of the house sometimes, even if it is only a 15 min walk around our estate...sometimes i have this urge to ask our condo security guards if they will like a dog with them to patrol the premises...

5. some who responded are e.g. sahms with kids, or retired elderly without helper. being a sahm without a maid, caring for kids is tough enough a job, plus the household chores etc. i have to remember to check with them if they are prepared for the amount of workload that will come with amy...e.g.:

- amy, being a typical beagle, sheds. for a household with young children like toddlers or babies learning to crawl and play on the floor alot, cleanliness might be an issue. i had to get up earlier every morning before gabe woke up and before ming left for work, to walk and feed amy her breakfast, and then to sweep the floor etc. basically just to get the place ready...

- amy being the aristocrat, does not like to do her business in the soiled newspapers...so as soon as you see her past urine or motion on the papers in her pee tray, have to change them asap before she needs to go toilet again...else you have to be prepared to clean the floors...also she still have problem knowing how long she is, becoz she will still miss the papers in the pee tray when she passes motion...like her entire body is in the tray but her butt is slightly out and miss the tray!! so...have to be prepared to clean her pee and poo off the floors...i prefer my old flat the last time when amy was trained to do her business in the 2nd toilet in the kitchen which was seldom used, i just had to clear the papers, and sprayed clean the toilet floor, then put the tray and papers back inside...

- even tho amy is toilet trained, but she will have to be re-trained when she goes to the new home...so the new family will have to be prepared to do that...

- she gets very nervous during thunder and rain...and will salivate alot...and she will follow us around the house to be close to us during the time unless we settle her somewhere where she feels safe and secure...but with her drooling everywhere, the new family again have to be prepared to have to clean and mop the floor if they cannot stand her saliva everywhere...

6. basic dog care:

- frontline and heartworm prevention tablet once a month;

- bath once a week or fortnight;

- brush teeth and clean ears once a week (at least)...something i have been guilty of not able to do as often as i would like...for her teeth, thank God the "greenies" is doing a good job keeping her teeth healthy and she likes to eat that as a treat....

- clip her nails once a month...something i never had the courage to do myself...haha...i have been bringing her to Angelin and Lish's previous petstore (Petzstuff) in clementi for her monthly basic groom...they know the most important task was to clip amy's nails...now the shop has been bought over and renamed to "Pets and U", nevertheless, amy still goes there for her monthly groom...and she loves the new couch in the shop front, seems to be very at home and her favourite spot!! i am grateful for the help i got from the shop!!

- annual vaccination...

- amy has skin problem so we have to be careful what to feed her. no treats if possible and at the moment, she is doing well with the "back to basic" kibbles, pork flavour..she did well in barf (raw salmon steak) before too...but that is if the new family can put up with her fishy body odor...hehe...but her coat shined very nicely that time when she was on salmon steaks...just smelly and oily...

i hope i have not missed anything so far....

before we make our decision, i will request for amy to meet the new family at their home and environment so to allow us to assess for ourselves if the new family is suitable match and for them to know amy's characters and temperament if she is what they want to be a part of their family....and once we find the right home, i hope the new family will agree to allow us to visit again in the first month just to see how amy is doing...we will eventually have to let go and leave people alone...

i do hope to minimize the chance of amy having to go to different homes, which is why i dun want foster homes...if possible, let her next home be her permanent home...however, if things really do not work out, i will take amy back at no time and that will be the end of any re-homing attempt...we have to come to term that...amy shall stay in the crate for long hours during the weekdays or short hours during the weekends when we have to be out...for the rest of her life....

she is getting used to it so far so good...except for yesterday due to the heavy rain and thunder storm...i came home to a very wet amy in the crate, sleeping in her own drool....but she was fine after a good wipe, and settled down after awhile....just that i do not know how to live with the guilt every time when i have to put her inside the crate and close the door...looking at that eyes staring at me...

oh my...look at the time...its time to go home :)

have come to a decision to re-home amy to a better home, than what we can provide to her...have been thinking about this for a long long time but the thot of losing her is painful...but now i believe re-homig her will be better for her:

1. no thanks to the horrible weather of rain and thunder storm, her fear of the thunder has gotten worst, such that she would scratch the front door DAILY irregardless rain or shine...never mind that the door is ruined, since the day we moved it, it was already ruined by her and we have accepted it...but she scratched so hard until her paws bleed...and turn the place into a murder scene...initially i would let her be, thinking that she would not do it on the good days so at least her paws could heal...but she is now doing it everyday, so the bleeding is also getting worst as she never allow the paws to heal before she would inflict the woulds on herself again....so now, we have to resort to putting her inside her crate all day long until we are home! this was something i was against of doing...but there was nothing else i could do to stop her scratching the door...we have put up "obstable course" of chairs etc. to block her from getting to the front door...with gabe's children chairs from ikea which she is afraid of...that did not stop her from jumping over them, while we all had the problem of stepping over these while carrying the sleeping kids to get out of the apartment, or to get in!!

2. with two kids and no helper at home, we are simply exhausted just caring for the kids...i am having problem finding time to walk her...and weekends are always filled with activities for the kids and then church on sunday, i hardly have the time to bring her to the park and to her favourite dogrun...if i do not need to crate her all day long, it will still work as she would have the free roam of the place during the day and night...but now that we have to crate her, she will need to be walked...no longer can she be a couch potato...

i feel sorry for her, sometimes she feels more like a prisoner at home, sometimes i catch her looking out to the world in the balcony, with that longing look and when i do have the chance to walk her, she would be jumping with joy all the way to the door...i love her very much, she is like my first child!! i never thot i would act on this re-homing her, never thot it would be us to do so...like giving up a prt of me....

when we first got her when she was a puppy, i broke down toilet training her during her first week with us, and i gave her to a friend with landed property...i missed her so much so i cried all day and night for days...and prayed for her return...i called my friend almost daily to see how she was...and when my friend told me that it was not working out between amy and her cat, and wanted to return to us, i was over the moon!!! after we got her back, i was determined to make it work, signed up for puppylove training school to teach her and myself basic commands etc. and it worked out so well...she is such a great dog, hardly make any sounds at home, sometimes we wondered and worried if she was able to bark at all but then she showed us what a beagle bay was...LOUD and such beautiful music :) when gabe was born, we discovered her gentle side with kids...she was more bullied by gabe niowadays than the other way around...even now, kris is starting to enjoy her presence...whenever she was around, kris stared at her and would start smiling and giggling at her....

omg...what am i doing...ming has been asking me if i was sure to want to go thru with this....this time, i must think with my head and not my emotion...it is for her good, and yes i am sure!! she needs a better home...i am only looking for home with the following conditions:

1. a home with existing dog(s) preferably beagles...so to keep her company....we dog-sit brownie before and amy really appreciated another 4-legged being at home to play with her...but she was still young at that time, i wonder if she still likes that...or...

2. a home with someone at home like 80% of the time...e.g. family with a maid/helper at home, retiree/elderly, SAHMs etc. so someone will be at home to keep her company...she seems to hate to be alone nowadays with her extreme fear of the rain and thunder...

so the search begins....and i hope God will provide a better home for her, one that she deserves...i do love you, amy...please forgive me...

mommy hasn't updated my photos for sometimes...it is time...some of the photos she took of me recently...